one week left.

Since Rhea mentioned the baby steps and big leaps...here's mine.

It's one week until I leave for Chicago.
And it's one week and one day until it's been ten months with him.

It was unbelievable almost ten months ago, when I met someone new who surprised and delighted me after recently dealing with a disappointing turn in my life. It was surreal when Rhea found her someone new who made her feel the same way. And then suddenly, it occurred to us our small group of friends from college were all in relationships of varying lengths but of similar sentiments.

We were all either falling in love, or had already kerplunked into it and were happily swimming in it like pairs of cuddle-fishies.

But as the months passed (and we kept count), out came the hurdles. Shari had to move to London because her visa didn't come through. Akhil moved back to India because he had visa issues as well. Tiff didn't get her visa either and soon she'll be going back home to Manila. Kat is going to med school in DC while Al stays up in New York.

As for me, I got accepted into the optometry school in Chicago. And with the exception of the first and only summer break, the short winter and spring breaks, I'll be in Chicago for the next four years. When I'm done, I'll be turning 27 that year, which is a scary thought, especially since it was that age of settling down way back when but now it's looming closer than expected. I'm thankful at least that Doug (from Singapore, getting a PhD at Caltech) is here for the next four years as well, so we won't be doing international long distance like Rhea is. But what happens after four years? Where will I go home to, LA or Singapore?

The thing is, as those who love me know, I've given the long distance thing a try once before. First it was domestic, then international, and to just really rub salt in the wound (because it did hurt), there was no e-mailing, skyping, or calling - just letters. And though I was given a time limit of two years separated, I could never really see the end to it. So when I decided to go to Chicago, and knowing how the separation could feel like, doing it for the second time seemed unthinkable. Of course, I could think of it the way Tiff said - I've grown up, matured, and learned from my mistakes. And maybe I have. I certainly hope so.

So instead of worrying about what will happen in four years, I'll make sure I have the most updated version of Skype, that my Blackberry is always fully charged, and hopefully we'll always have a plan to see each other once a month.

Baby steps.

Well, its more like giant baby steps. I'm moving today, officially. Meaning I'll be starting school, paying for cable, and coming home to my own apartment every night. Its a bit surreal really. I'm excited and scared at the same time and really wishing I wasn't doing this on my own. Then again, I guess I'm not truly on my own. I'm joining 139 other people coming from near and far to begin the crazy life that is medical school. Hmm, that still doesn't put me more at ease. Well, since this is a blog about long distance relationships, I should mention how I've been worrying lately about how the busy school schedule will affect my time to talk and be in touch with my boy. Its hard enough dealing with an 9 and 1/2 hour time difference. I'll be busy in class when he's ready to go to bed and he'll be rushing out to work when I'm finally getting back home. :-( We'll see what happens over the next few weeks but in the meantime, will you guys please download skype and get your video chats working [thats you Kat]! I feel like I'm currently in long distance relationships with more than just my boyfriend.

As I sort out my next few problems, I encourage all of you to download Ride by Cary Brothers. It was featured in the movie, Last Kiss, by Zach Braff (which I haven't actually seen) but I imagine it'll be as good as Garden State :-) Netflix, here I come! Also, I wish the best of luck to all my fellow friends who are taking big steps (more like leaps) of their own right now. 

I'm not one for cliches but maybe there's something to them...

So, 8 months and 2 days into our relationship and I can safely say I've never been happier. Even now, it brings a smile to my face to think of our conversation this morning when I went through my ordinary routine of telling him about my plans for the day. I'm sure my fellow passengers on the bus this morning wouldn't have guessed I was having anything but a normal conversation with my boyfriend. Well I was, even though he's 7300 miles away. In our ever growing, globalized world, I can be thankful for the innovations that have allowed me to stay in touch with my love, despite the many deserts, oceans, and countries that separate us. As my first entry in my first ever blog (about long distance relationships no less...i mean, who would've expected this?), I plan to share my experiences and a few handy tools to help others who may find themselves in a situation like my own. 

Reliance allows me to use my phone to call internationally without the worry of hearing my dad be like "Rhea, have you SEEN this phone bill?!?!?!" Basically its a pre-paid calling card that has amazing rates for international phone calls (7 cents/min for India). It allows me to call anytime I would like for however long I like without putting a dent in my phone bill, because it channels the call through a local, toll free number.  There are similar options out there including jajah among others.

I think its a necessity to have video chats (I mean, how long are you supposed to go without seeing each other?) I mostly use ichat (don't get me started on how much I love my macbook), but I also use skype as an alternative, especially since its free for anyone to download. Not to mention that you can also make phone calls through skype for really cheap rates as well.

For his part, since he can access email and internet through his iphone (the two of us promote apple in our spare time) he uses fring, to allow him to access gchat and/or skype at any time or place. This is handy for those of you who don't want to end up glued to the computer. 

That about covers the basics of our set up. I'm sure we've just scratched the surface of all the great resources out there, which makes me wonder how many others are dealing with the same thing as me. Now the question remains - (no, not the question of how I ended up in my long distance relationship) - does this help me forget that we are so far apart? Well, no, its still tough. But I'm beginning to believe that distance does make the heart grow fonder. Plus, I know a good thing when I see one.